Thursday, June 30, 2016

Nommity-Nom-Nom-Nom

I am *such* a good boy!
Apparently the Human agrees today.
Good Boys sometimes get The Gerber's.
For maximum enjoyment, listen carefully.

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Spitty Speaks About Shelves

Hi Kitties! I understand my place was usurped by That Aggie last night. Well, that's all right I guess, except for the part where she called me a fleabag. I will have to have *my* people call *her* people about that.

So here's what the Human's been doing for a couple of days, along with going to work (only a little) and going out without my permission (too much).

This is the shelving in the dining room that provides the backdrop for so many of my stunning* portraits and action shots. There are six little cubbies and the one big countertop. As you can tell (maybe) the blue squares indicate the cubbies which have been decluttered and tidied up to contain basically one category of item (A = small electronic items, B = office supplies, 
C = cat stuff  & F = adult beverages), and the red ones have yet to be sorted (D = random Very Important Papers** & 
E = picture albums and stuff).

Finally, there's the Big Red Square, and frankly, I have no idea what the hell she's going to do about that.


Sorry, CK--have you trademarked that yet?
** So, can you tell she's not filed anything for awhile?

Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Good Evening from Cousin Aggie



Remember when people kept diaries and got mad when someone read them?


Now, they put everything online and get mad when people don't.


Heh, heh. *I* keep my thoughts to myself, unlike that fleabag.








P.S. Spittola and the Human are having some minor camera troubles, which is why you are being so fortunate as to see me today. They'll be along soon enough. If I say so.

Monday, June 27, 2016

I Look Good Enough to Eat

Or at least that's what the Human says.

I dunno. It sounds a little, uh, creepy to me.

Do your Humans ever say weird stuff that makes you wonder whether it's safe to snooze with both eyes closed?

I'm not sure I want to be "scrumptious."

Sunday, June 26, 2016

Sunday Selfie: Spitty Is Stretchy





Ah, Kitties, life is good, despite the occasional tiny intruder.

For those who wonder where the, uh, unwelcome "visitors" have come from, I posit two explanations:

(1) The Stoopy Human brought them in on her shoes or clothing;

or

(2) Although I am an Only Cat, there *are* other kitties in the building, some of whom are indoor/outdoor, and there may be ::shhhhhhh:: critters loose in the hallways.

Saturday, June 25, 2016

                                 Behold: I Am Spittola

Lord of the Fleas

The Human is using a judicious combination of Advantage, frequent vacuuming & eternal vigilance to see if we can avoid The Bomb. Guerrilla warfare continues.

Thursday, June 23, 2016

Watchoo Lookin' At, Human Lady?


Sooooooo there I was, relaxing my potentially-still-flea-harboring floofy body on the white chair. You wanna make something of it?

Well, do you?

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

Stealth Factor Grade: D-




According to the Human, I was saved from an F grade because I can be soooooooo silent that it counts as extra stealth.

You can't see me if you don't know where to look.

Monday, June 20, 2016

The Human Says . . .

this looks SO uncomfortables but I know you'll agree it is a delightful po-zish.

Sunday, June 19, 2016

Sprawling Sunday Selfie

Well, Kitties, I know it sounds wimpy to those of you in truly sultry climates, but it was a hideous 82 degrees today and honestly, I really don't care for that. I needed to sprawl unconscious in my beddie for a good part of the day. I don't know *what* the Human did with herself, but at least she's not covered in fur, *beautiful* fur, you understand. But unremovable.

Saturday, June 18, 2016

Boxing Day



















It is the first box I have ever loved. Do you think it loves me back?

Friday, June 17, 2016

Could I *Be*

any more adorable?
This blend of good looks and brains should be illegal.

P.S. The Human says it would be good for me for you all to take me down a peg or six.

Thursday, June 16, 2016

Wake Me When It's Over

Our fridge went kaput. The Human had to move all the stoopy hallway furnitures around last night and shove everything into the living room and I did not like that one little bit, let me tell you. 

But then this morning she scooped me right up out of a dead-asleep nappy and tossed me into the bedroom and closed the door. I drew plenty of bloods first, let me tell you. You would have been proud of me, Kitties!

Then some men came and took our refrigerator away and brought a new one, and now we has ice cubes again.

Like *I* care about that! It was an unnerving morning, let me tell you. But later I had a good nap in my purple beddie and I have forgiven the Human. She looks cute in those band-aids!

Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Purrity-Purr-Purr-Purr

Excuse the eye schmutz, please. As several sympathetic black kitties noted on my "Dusty" post yesterday, *everything* shows on us. It's such a burden to look our best.

But really, just listen. Can't you feel your blood pressure dropping and your bliss increasing?

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Yes, I Can Hear You Asking Yourselves:

"How does he get so dusty?"
And, honestly? I think that's sort of rude.

Monday, June 13, 2016

Amusing the Human

It's been kind of a rough week so far in the Human world, so I decided to give her a chance to snap a few photos of my amusing and entertaining pre- and post-prandial antics.
First, after six years, has she not learned to focus the camera? And second, what is that, that, that thing slithering in from stage left in picture #2? 
I ask you: Is this the kind of work that earns a passing grade?

Sunday, June 12, 2016

Hijacking the Blog Today

I rarely use Spitty's blog for any purpose other than allowing him to relate his adventures as he navigates his little world and critiques me, his Human.

But today is different.

We all woke this morning to news of terrorism in Orlando, Florida. The senseless deaths of so many innocents is a national tragedy.

Yet, that is not what prompts me to write today. No, what is on my mind is a different, closer tragedy: the death Friday night of one of our seniors, a kind and bright and beautiful young woman whose name I read at our graduation ceremony June 3, along with 61 of her classmates, her Spartan sisters. She and her boyfriend died in a horrific car crash, ejected from a car driven by another young man, going 90 mph on a street in South San Francisco. The driver survived and will face terrible charges for the deaths he caused, but none of that changes what has already happened. Our student, full of happiness, and excitement, and promise a mere week ago, is gone before she really had a life at all.

The cliches of death fail at times like this; no platitudes like "Well, he lived a wonderful long life..." or "Well, at least she isn't suffering anymore..." leap to mind or tongue. There is just a great yawning void where once stood a vibrant girl on the brink of her adult life. The loss to her family is immeasurable.

In my 42 years as a teacher and administrator, a handful of students have died. Each loss brings great sorrow for a life cut brutally short by illness, suicide, accident. There's nothing for it but to cherish and care for the others and try to learn anew whatever hard lessons the Universe is teaching.

Spitty will be back tomorrow.


Saturday, June 11, 2016

Exciting Caturday News



So the Human got a brand-new Honda Civic (the Silver Bullet), and *I* got a new box with a soft, freshly-laundered towel in the bottom.


Seems fair to me.



Friday, June 10, 2016

Frumpy Friday


I'm feeling fusty and frowsy and unhappy that the insensitive Human decided to use my picture anyway. I think *I* should be allowed to take *her* picture just as she awakens from a very sound nappie. 
I told her she better use a small version or her punishment would increase proportionately. I think I scared her a little, 'cause she changed it from "Original size" to "Small."  
Exiting news tomorrow, Kitties. Or she thinks it is anyway. Stay tuned!

Thursday, June 9, 2016

Wheeee! It's Kitty Gymboree Time!


These are my favorite times of day! In the morning and at night (on good days, *twice* at nighttime), the Human and I have kitty Gymboree times. I stretch and get ready, and then I whap things and run through my tunnels and play with my dangly toys. Sometimes I have to gently tap* at the Human's ankles, or stretch my paws up to the computer desk to remind her, but a King needs his playtimes to decompress from the daily royal stresses.

*Okay, sometimes there might be a claw and a drop or two of blood involved.

Monday, June 6, 2016

The Thinker

I am contemplating the demise of these fleas that I've been hosting at Spitty's Airbnb for a couple of weeks now.

Should I feel guilty for their assassination at the hands of the Human?

After all, they never paid their rent, they took Advantage (heh, heh) of three free squares a day, plus unlimited snacks, and honestly, they weren't very polite.

No, all in all, I am not going to miss them when they Check Out over the next several days. I hope I get a really bad Yelp review.

Sunday, June 5, 2016

Sunday Selfies: I'm a Slytherin,
A Disappointed Slytherin

Well shoot, this isn't what I was hoping to find! 
It's a disgrace: Breakfast leftovers! 
Surely you don't expect me to eat this for dinner?

Saturday, June 4, 2016

What a Good Boy Am I!

 And . . . I'm baaaack!

Today I have a question for you, Kitties:

Which of the items in this Still Life with Butterfly does not belong in my home?
Here I am, being a purrfectly good boy despite the invasion of my purrsonal space by a nasty little tube of poison squeezed out on the back of my innocent and unsuspecting furry little neck.

How *dare* she? 

I am appalled by her betrayal. But I do spy a jar of the Gerber's. So, hmmmmm.